I think most of us will agree that the basis of caregiving is that it is about people. The ones we care for, the ones we interact with while providing help, and not the least of which, trying really hard to care for ourselves. People make our world.
A great many people have lately been producing (rather loudly) commentary that has not made us feel very comfortable. No matter where your views lie along the political spectrum, there has likely been someone telling you were wrong, and you must change.
I am forever an optimist. Not that everything is always rosy, but I try very hard to not dwell on negatives. I like to find the good, wherever and whenever it exists.
Spoiler alert!
While these are difficult times, discovering that much of our human experience has not been diminished by this current incivility has been heartening. A great many people continue to be the people we have always known. Maybe it is because the folks in the heartland of this country do not concern themselves with the abstracts of labels and other heady debates. The media just likes to portray a few exceptions with bullhorns as commonplace. I am happy to report that they are still just exceptions.
Rediscovering People
Last summer I had the wonderful need to travel across the country, though I did not realize the gifts such a journey had to offer at the time.
Time was not a factor, so I decided to create an adventure and travel by rail. I have never done this before, and being of a disposition lately where exploration of new experiences sounds like a good idea most of the time, I signed on for an Amtrak ride.
The ride became a connection with the people that political pundits say no longer exist. I am overjoyed to report that the personalities that most all of us grew up with still exist in abundance across the United States.
A Pandemic Shadow
The remnants of COVID restrictions were still in the process of being lifted as I traveled. After years of closure, the dining car was open once again – a big event in Amtrak circles apparently. In listening to the language of the staff, there was still much uncertainty of being near one another without the mandated measures to separate us.
Who would have thought that sitting down to a meal could involve such uncertainty? We were learning, however.
With everyone being reintroduced to one another after so much fear and anxiety, the reluctance was understandable. In a fashion typical of recent history, the railroad began mandating behavior, or at the very least, strongly suggesting we comply.
The issue? We needed to sit with strangers if we wished to eat in the dining car.
I cannot say that this was a particularly disagreeable mandate.
Next thing I knew, I was chatting over meals with America. A middle-aged mother and her kids on their first adventure by rail, a retired aerospace engineer who has been traveling the country by rail for years, even a few rookie solo travelers like me.
The best part about it was that even with the uneasiness of pandemic still lurking in the background, it all started to feel “normal”. You remember normal, right? When the commonplace is just that.
Takeaways
From this adventure, I found reassurance.
Know that we are still good people. Media has amplified a horrible theme that is not true of most of us. We have been through much, but we are not changed all that much. We retain the same traits and decency that we used to take for granted.
Like returning (or recovering) from caregiving, we may be changed but much of the world remains the same. There is a special assurance in the knowledge that people are still just people. Our essence as people remains strengthened and unchanged by events.
I hope this message of hope reassures you that the same motivations that brought you into care for others remain a stable foundation to build upon as we venture into the changed world in which we find ourselves.
Knowing that decent people still are still plentiful sure helps.
“Doubt makes a man decent.”
― Harry Crews
Dad's Back 