Finding Assisted Living That is A Good Fit

One of the larger steps we face in caregiving is the decision to relocate our loved ones into Assisted Living. Just the idea of that change can be daunting but if it becomes the best next move, finding an Assisted Living facility is easier when you do it by the numbers. It will involve a lot of work but we are good at doing the work by now.

Starting Off

Step one is having the legal works already done. Power-of-Attorney (POA) documents are the must-have items. Have the POA document for legal matters but it is best to also have the health-care POA. Circumstances can sometimes overlap and you will need both. Having the documents handy, along with copies to share as needed, will be a big help.

Next look critically at the finances you are, or soon will be, managing. Figure out what sort of real budget you’ve got to work with. If needed, look at ways to economize. I ended up selling Dad’s old car to pay off debts before I had a realistic monthly income to take out shopping the Assisted Living market. It took a few months of restructuring income vs. debt but I got there through some tough management decisions – and some tough love with Dad. This is just one of your realities, ready or not.

Look at healthcare, entitlements, and any other benefits you think may be available. Did your loved one belong to the military, church congregations, fraternities or sororities? Some benefits may be monetary, others may be services, discounts or products for which your loved one may qualify. This is where being well-acquainted with the business affairs of your loved one can pay off. Hit the Internet, speak with company representatives, and ask friends and neighbors too. There are lots of benefits out there. Some are easier to obtain than others. Just apply. The worst that can happen is they will say no.

Shopping

Okay. Now you’ve got a somewhat realistic picture of finances and the monies your loved one will have available. Time to start the shopping process.

This is a point in the process where you may feel hurried but please don’t. You are going to be encountering a lot of sales information. Shop at your own speed and to the point at which you feel comfortable. It is okay to disappoint sales people. Remember that you are in charge here.

So, let’s start online with a search engine to look at facilities in the area of your search. Googling “assisted living facilities (insert your town name)” or “assisted living facilities near me” will usually give you a number of places nearby that you can start researching.

Be careful of search results that are noted as being an Ad. These companies paid to have their results placed at the top of your search. They are hungry for business (why?) and advertising for your area. The company locations may or may not actually be nearby. Just be cautious.

Getting Out

So now you’ve spent several hours looking at all of the beautiful websites. Time to start organizing for your road trips.

Put together a list of your favorite facilities in order of preference, based on your readings so far. If your circumstances allow, include your loved one in the decision making process. I found that the more buy-in I had from Dad, the easier things rolled later.

And don’t forget to invite other family members to join the process. Somebody needs to lead the project but including others helps you a whole lot now, and may actually help to keep the peace in the family later.

Tour as many facilities as you can manage in a day and keep going out for as many days as it takes. Each location is different and has a different vibe. Some places will feel comfortable, others will give off that creepy institutional atmosphere. Trust your gut here. If the people and surroundings make you feel comfortable, it is probably a pretty cool place.

Brass Tacks of Assisted Living

On your tours, you are collecting any and all information you can get out of the managers. Prices, sizes, contracts, amenities – everything is considered. Some places offer many services for a flat fee and some specialty items (like laundry, medicine administration, snacks) at a separate price. Some places offer a very low base rate and everything else is purchased a la carte. (Be careful.) Be specific and price out every location’s offerings. Ask probing questions and don’t assume anything. Know your options.

While many Assisted Living facilities are owned and run by corporations, there are some privately owned businesses that are well worth looking at. Sometimes the owner is right on the premises, which is great for asking questions or resolving issues. These small businesses must comply with the same regulations as the big box places, so they should be just as safe and clean, but I found them to have a much homier feel.

Once you have all of your subjective notes (the “feel” of the places) and objective notes (are they within the budget?) gathered, prioritize your final first choice, second choice, etc. Again, include family in the decision-making process if you see fit but try for as balanced a choice as possible. And as far as family goes, the really honest conversations need to occur. If the loved one is going into Assisted Living now, they are likely not going to come home again someday. Reality sucks sometimes and you are the designated messenger for this event. Be clear.

If you want some third party verification of the operations of different facilities, here are a couple of links with accreditation information for Assisted Living institutions.

https://archive.ahrq.gov/professionals/systems/long-term-care/resources/facilities/ltcscan/ltc4.html

https://www.carepathways.com/articles/how-to-measure-quality-and-compare-assisted-living.cfm

Best of luck in your search!